Avers Pitch
The legend of Avers Field is one few dare to recollect. This is largely due to the fact that most people in the town of Avers Pitch are mute and illiterate. The few that do dare to recollect it are the few that can speak, but being around those that are mute they haven't garnered a proper grasp of the English language and so they really do have to dare to speak of the subject because of how unlikely it is they'll be able to convey anything to an individual.
The town of Avers Pitch is an oddity, filled with stories to tell and yet cannot be told because of the residents that are knoweldgeable of such events. It has made numerous world record collections as "the most people mute in one town" and has also be voted as the town most likely to be confused with a zoo. Many tourists have visited the land in hopes of seeing one of the gorillas that wear clothes. If they knew they were, in fact, people, they'd probably flee right away and accuse the land of being of a perverse invention.
With no real education it is up to the residents of Avers Pitch to communicate in their own means. They can't talk and they don't know sign language and so they communicate to each other with a series of abusive threats. No one in Avers Pitch is a very happy person, least of which the mayor who is frequently beaten to a pulp when someone votes for him during an election. And just last week a young boy was killed in an attempt to explain to him the birds and the bees. His mother, in an attempt to explain the need to revise their popular form of communication, broke the knee caps of twelve members of the city council. This proved most effective, not because they understood the message very well, but because they wanted to have knees that worked. Something had to be done, but first a doctor's visit was integral.
The doctor in Avers Pitch is the richest man in town. At every checkup he slaps his patients in the face and bites them on the hand to tell them they if they are healthy or otherwise. For the knee surgeries of the twelve council members he had to rough them up in the face quite a bit before putting them under.
Yes, something must be done.
But about this legend, the legend of Avers Field, that is...
The town of Avers Pitch is an oddity, filled with stories to tell and yet cannot be told because of the residents that are knoweldgeable of such events. It has made numerous world record collections as "the most people mute in one town" and has also be voted as the town most likely to be confused with a zoo. Many tourists have visited the land in hopes of seeing one of the gorillas that wear clothes. If they knew they were, in fact, people, they'd probably flee right away and accuse the land of being of a perverse invention.
With no real education it is up to the residents of Avers Pitch to communicate in their own means. They can't talk and they don't know sign language and so they communicate to each other with a series of abusive threats. No one in Avers Pitch is a very happy person, least of which the mayor who is frequently beaten to a pulp when someone votes for him during an election. And just last week a young boy was killed in an attempt to explain to him the birds and the bees. His mother, in an attempt to explain the need to revise their popular form of communication, broke the knee caps of twelve members of the city council. This proved most effective, not because they understood the message very well, but because they wanted to have knees that worked. Something had to be done, but first a doctor's visit was integral.
The doctor in Avers Pitch is the richest man in town. At every checkup he slaps his patients in the face and bites them on the hand to tell them they if they are healthy or otherwise. For the knee surgeries of the twelve council members he had to rough them up in the face quite a bit before putting them under.
Yes, something must be done.
But about this legend, the legend of Avers Field, that is...
posted by Boris Stoke | 12:30 PM
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